What do you expect from such simple creatures? Your last name stays put. The garage is all yours. Wedding plans take care of themselves. Chocolate is just another snack. You can be President. You can never be pregnant. You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park. You can wear NO shirt to a water park. Car mechanics tell you the truth. The world is your urinal. You never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one is just too icky. You don’t have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt. Same work, more pay. Wrinkles add character. Her Wedding dress - $5000. Your Tux rental - $100. People never stare at your chest when you’re talking to them. The occasional well-rendered belch (or fart)is practically expected. New shoes don’t cut, blister, or mangle your feet. One mood all the time.
Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat. You know stuff about tanks. A five-day vacation requires only one small suitcase. You can open all your own jars. You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness. If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend.
Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack. Three pairs of shoes are more than enough. You almost never have strap problems in public. You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes. Everything on your face stays its original color. The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades. You only have to shave your face and neck.
You can play with toys all your life. Your belly usually hides your big hips. One wallet and one color for all seasons. You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look. You can “do” your nails with a pocket knife. You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache. You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes.
No wonder men are happier.
This post might be related to Hi, my name is Mark, and I’m colorblind,Dual Graphics Cards,Happiness = Elusive,Bachelors, Take Note!!,Sidewalk Chalk Drawings,. See other posts from the 'Humor, Point of View' category.
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10 Responses to Why Men Are Happier
Men certainly have it easier, although I’m not sure that makes them happier than us. I also have to say that the moodiest people I know are men. Fun read though. :)
$8.95 for a 3 pack of underwear? Outrageous!
“You know stuff about tanks” i love it
Too bad women hold themselves to ridiculous standards and rarely come to terms with what they want out of life…
Yes, men may be happier… But I want to see one of them push out a child with no pain medication! HA! Men may be happier but when it comes to dealing with pain women have them beat.
Lol, you have a good point there Susan… Like a bowling ball through a keyhole eh? :)
Kinda like passing a kidney stone.
One thing I never understood: Why don’t women rent a wedding dress? They never wear it again and their daughter won’t either.
Yea, some some more rock. We also died 5 years sooner, can’t express any emotions except rage and ridicule, and have less clothing choices than the dolls you played with when ever countries go to war we typically get shot more often. And we are under tremendous pressure to find some random girl and pay all her bills or else we’re “losers”. Oh yea, and we can’t marry for money in lieu of a career.
Anyone that thinks men have it easy simply doesn’t have a penis. Spend a life with one, you’ll change your tune. And any men agreeing to this are simply responding to that pressure i was speaking of an performing for a girl or in the hopes of acquiring one.
8.95 for underwear???
i can get a 3 pack for 3
I think,there are some valid points to the original statement.But some things were missed I believe.Besides passing on younger than women,men feel no need to re-arrange the furniture every so often.Why women do,is beyond me.It must not have been in the best place the first time.Why do women feel compelled to throw away their mans old items?If I throw my wifes away,my head would be on a pole out in the front yard.So,I could give examples all day of the flipside to life,but,I think most would agree that both sexes have their little quirks,do they not?
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